• today me and the kids are going down into my studio and I have a ton of cards to make….
    I am actually super excited about this and really praying the kids let me get a lot done.
    I am going to set them up with their stuff that I keep down there and let them loose.

    It feels good to be "me" again…..blogging almost every day….now I'm going to go make a ton of cards….it's like my creativity has been on hold for the last year…from writing, to card making, to working on art…just the stress of this last year really stifled the creative side of me and I am so happy to be back. 🙂

    But right now…I have to go have a fight with the kids They love to give me a hard time about getting dressed and ready for the day. I HATE. IT. when they do that! I'm trying to think of a way to get them to quit doing that because I truly hate it with a passion….Plus, their life is going to be full of having to do things they really don't want to do and they better learn how to do it with a good attitude or their lives are gonna be miserable. I'm realizing that's a really, really hard thing to "teach". To have a positive attitude even if you aren't happy about something. It's like your natural reaction is to be pissy and mad and whine about it. I've been telling them it's okay to feel what you are feeling, it's how you ACT that matters. I explain that if you do the thing you don't want to do, with a good attitude, it'll make it easier….

    They think I'm full of shit and they ain't buying my sunshine and rainbow speech….at all.

    So I'm trying to come up with some kind of reward thing for them…..I'm thinking like a small jar and I'll take them to pick out pretty rocks or marbles and every time they get dressed or do something I ask that they don't want to do, WITHOUT whining or complaining, we'll put a rock or marble in the jar….then once it's full, we'll get them something or take them somewhere. That the tenative plan….we'll see what I decide on.

    Off to create!!! I'm wanting to get like 5-7 cards done today….GAME ON!

    LOL I just like saying that…..ha! 

  • Obviously there were many, many touching moments during MJ's memorial……funny stories, touching tributes, heartbreaking pleas….I could sit here quoting all day…but 2 moments stand out, for me. (aside from the gut wrenching, heart breaking, tearful good bye from his daughter….)

    This, from Stevie Wonder….

    "This is a moment that I wish that I didn't live to see come. But as
    much as I can say that and mean it, I do know that God is good and I do
    know that as much as we may feel — and we do — that we need Michael
    here with us, God must have needed him far more." — Stevie Wonder.

    And this from Rev. Al Sharpton…

    “There ain’t nothin’ strange about your daddy! It was strange what he had to deal with!”

    I loved this…I really, really did. Now, we all know he did, indeed, get weirder and weirder as the years went by. But really, was it any more odd than anyone else? Was it just because his eccentricities were on a worldwide stage that made them seem even MORE bizarre. I don't know. What I do know is that I have certainly known stranger people in my life….I watch a woman walk by my house on the way the school, every day. She talks to herself. Loudly. Even fights sometimes….and then I watch her walk back with her two children, walking holding their hands. And you would not think anything was up with this woman, seeing her with her children. It's like she manages to shelf the bizarre behavior….

    Point being….there are a lot of strange people in the world…..if nothing else comes out of this tragedy….perhaps we can all learn to be more tolerant of each other….of our differences. It's what makes the world go 'round…..

  • Of course, I'll be watching…

    Some people are in an uproar over the amount of coverage Michael Jackson's death ( that is still so weird to type….) is receiving.

    I'm honestly shocked that people would think it would be anything less….
    The suddenness of his death, the tragedy of it all….the irony that he was on the verge of the huge London concerts….of course it would be a spectacle….nothing Michael Jackson did was NOT a spectacle….
    how could anyone on this planet not be expecting coverage like this? It truly boggles my mind….

    Now, one person….has decided to use this to get himself some attention. I refuse to repost any video…I won't contribute to his national attention….but I am going to talk about it because it is a perfect example of the kind of morons that are in public office. I don't know how people like this get elected…..I really don't. 

    So here is some of what congressman from New York, Peter King had to say…

    "Let's knock out the psychobabble. This guy was a pervert, he was a
    child molester, he was a pedophile and to be giving this much coverage
    to him, day in and day out, what does it say about us as our country?

    I just think we're too politically correct. No one wants to stand up
    and say we don't need Michael Jackson. He died, he had some talent,
    fine.

    There are people dying every day. There's men and women dying today in Afghanistan. Let's give them the credit they deserve.

    I really think the media has disgraced itself. I think that too many
    people in public life have made fools about themselves talking about
    Michael Jackson as if he's some kind of hero.

    There's nothing good about this guy. He may have been a good singer.
    He did some dancing. Bottom line is, would you let your child or
    grandchild be in the same room with Michael jackson? What are we
    glorifying him for?

    So anyway, let's take some time out to really look to the people
    that do make this a great country. The men and women of the armed
    forces, police, firefighters, teachers who work in really rough
    neighborhoods, people who volunteer with dying cancer patients, people
    who work in AIDS clinics.

    They're the ones we should be glorifying, not some pervert like Michael Jackson."

    First of all, just because this death is being hugely and widely covered does not diminish anyone's career or anyone else's death. At least, I don't minimize those things just because Michael Jackson died and I have more faith in my fellow Americans…..I don't think they think any less of our soldiers or teachers or firefighters or police, or anyone else. And frankly, I see coverage about those professions every day. So I'm not really on board with that point….

    AND….last time I checked, Michael Jackson was acquitted in a criminal trial.  So that means this moron doesn't grasp the basic "innoncent until proven guilty" constitutional right every American has. I am fine if this guy believes that privately…but this is exactly the kind of judgemental crap that convicts people from media information alone. What the fuck does this guy know, really know? Was he there? Did he see Michael Jackson molesting kids? All he has to go on is what he has read in the media….oh wait…and a JURY that heard all the facts and acquitted him. Way to go, congressman…..

    And then he goes on to minimize the tremendous talent that Michael Jackson was. All that does is serve to make him look like a completely out of touch idiot. Because no matter what you thought of Michael Jackson, if you believed he molested kids or not, that does not diminish the amazing talent that that man held. And by minimizing that talent, it completely trivializes what you have to say! No one is going to take what you have to say seriously because now you just sound like a bitter, angry, out of touch, old white guy….this is BASIC people skills. WTF?!?! How did this man get elected??? 

    Getting off my soap box now…..that guy just seriously pissed me off.

    And added to the growing list of why I think greedy old white men are real fucking morons sometimes….not all of them, of course, but the amount of them is getting alarmingly large….

  • So I got my notebook.
    The annoying part of all this new notebook thing  is transferring stuff I want from the old notebook to the new one.
    There is so much I want still, so I can't just toss the old one.
    Annoying.
    But worth it.
    And I even made my "To Do" list for today, last night and I was really, super excited about it.

    But then I got up today….and I don't feel like doing it.
    Any of it.
    Not a damn thing on there do I want to do….

    I feel like total crap. (girl stuff…) And I'm really tired AND I can tell it's gonna get hot today, which sucks the motivation right out of me. *not complaining about the hot sunny day, just saying the heat drains me….LOL*

    I so did not factor this into my "back to good" equation.

    I have no clue what to do with this….
    I'm seriously stumped.

    fuck.

  • We wound up having a really good day.
    We took the kids to the parade in Merrimack and honestly, it was pretty similar to the Juneau parade! LOL
    But the cool thing about it was that there is a really beautiful park in Merrimack and we wound up parking there and then just walking up to the street to watch the parade. So we got to walk around the park for a little bit before the parade started….it was really cool and I got some nice pics…

    .

    this is a river that runs through the park…very cool!
    The kids loved it…

    Ben playing by the edge of the river…

    Jaime posing….LOL She so loves her picture taken and I can't figure out if this is a bad thing or not….lol. What I DO know is I'm getting a lot of good pictures out of her loving her picture taken, so works for me!!

    Zak, my mom and Jaime. There's something about this picture that I really love. 🙂

    Ben being his typical dorky self….

    so love this picture! Gonna frame this one…

    Here's some parade ones….like I said the parade itself was….cute. LOL not all that exciting…but the kids loved it.

    Look at the freakin' eyelashes on this kid! crazy long!! LOL

    Messy boy AND he discovered how cool it is to run around without a shirt! LOL His first time going without a shirt….he never would, before. So cute!

    See her freckles?? I love them!!  🙂

    And then we went home for a few hours..mom and I both took a nap while Zak took the kids to the pool. I have GOT to get a bathing suit that fits so I can go too…

    And then off to the fireworks! Someone from Mom's work told her that they park at the parking garage in downtown and they can see the fireworks perfectly, so we decided to try that. And it worked out perfect! (Aside from my near panic attacks when the kids went up to the wall…ugh, so hate heights!!)

     It was the first time both of the kids have been and they LOVED it. Jaime went once when she was about 2, but was NOT thrilled….this time, she LOVED it. Yay!!!

    all in all it was a really fun day!

    But I have to admit….there is nowhere like Juneau, Alaska for the 4th, especially when it's sunshiny and nice, like it was.  So while we had fun, it was great…I loved my mom being with us…there was a part of me that really, really missed Juneau and all our family and friends there! I think we are going to have to plan our yearly vacations to Alaska, for the 4th. Cause even when it's not nice out, it's still a damn good time!!! 🙂

    Enjoy!!

  • So I DID get my notebook yesterday!!
    I will spend some of today and tomorrow organizing it and stuff and start using it on Monday.
    I'm actually really excited!
    I have so missed my lists!!

    We don't have big plans for the 4th. We are going to the fireworks tonight, that is for sure. We might try to find a parade somewhere close, not 100% sure. We're kinda of just playing it by ear. Zak is cooking breakfast, I'm gonna go hop in the shower and we'll see from there.

    I'm already excited though…I drove mom to work this morning for 6am and then a couple hours later I hear her yell in the house.."Coffee's here!" from the side door. I thought it was my sister and that she had grabbed us coffee, which was super sweet, I thought. But then I go into the kitchen to head outside and it's mom! They sent her home cause it was so slow and she couldn't get a hold of me….I didn't hear the house phone ring and my cell phone was off…so she called my sister and got her to pick her up. Very cool! My mom home for the day AND she came with coffee! She's so awesome….:-) I so love when she's home….LOL

    So I'm off to get in the shower and find a parade….I think Merrimack (a town next to us) has one…..we'll see!!!

    Happy, Happy 4th to everyone!!!

  • Anyone see this coming?
    I sure didn't!

    Bye, bye Palin!

    Don't really have any thoughts on it, was just surprised….

    I know there is speculation that she will make a run for The White House in the next election, but I'm not convinced….
    I'd believe the senate seat over that.

    Or maybe it could really be her baby needs her at home.
    Not that anyone is gonna believe that….but you never know!

  • The sun is peeking out here and there….it's trying to come out and I am really, really hoping it succeeds!!!
    LOL

    My mind is BUSY this morning! There are so many things I want to do or get done and I just don't even know where to start….I"m thinking today things….future things….stuff I want to be better….I miss creating, I miss my blog, I miss my "to do" lists….and today is a turn around day. A day where I can feel a motivation in me to get back to good. Back to me….

    I don't know if I'm making sense, really. What I do know is I don't feel entirely complete right now and I feel like I'm letting life pass by and I'm not even "recording" it. I love this blog and the memories it keeps….and when I look back on the past year….God, there is just so much missing on here…..so many silly little things, some amazing things….some everyday things….just so much is not here. And it makes me a little sad.

    I need to get back to my blog and writing life down. I am so happy when I'm doing that. I know the kids will one day love having this glimpse into our everyday life…their life….and it's nice for the people who love us who are faraway to have this little spot where they can feel like they are keeping up.

    Not that many people read this but honestly, that's not the reason I do it…of course, I love when people do read it, but that's not what the blog is about for me….

    It's just my little spot in the world where I can write again…..and keep a journal of "us"……

    So today…..I am going to go get a new notebook…that's how I have always kept "to do" lists…in notebooks. Not only do my lists go in there but it's also my "thinking journal…" Anything inspiring..from my art to my marketing ideas to my business ideas to my lyrics……I always have a notebook full of sketches and notes and ideas……I am never without a notebook…and the one I have been using has been pretty full for awhile so I haven't been doing "to do" lists in it….and I really honestly think a  lot my problems can all be solved with that…..a new notebook.

    If I put "blog" as one of my things to do, that will force me to sit and think of something to write. Even when I think I have nothing or think I have so much I don't know where to start….either way, this will put my face in front of my blog and make me write. You have no idea how much I truly think that is part of why I haven't been blogging! It's crazy, but I truly do think so…I just need to be told to sit down and do it! Even if it's ME telling me! 

    So that is my mission for today. New notebook and a new resolve to get back to good.
     Back to my blog, back to taking & posting pictures, back to my cards….just back to good.

    And yes, I know I have done this before…..but today, this day, I am going to do something about it so that the resolve sticks!!!

    Wish me luck!

    And FYI…I almost gave up on this post because my mouse is messed up and it's royally pissing me off…!!!!!
    🙂

  • So it has been an incredibly horrible spring here.
    An unusual amount of rain…..it's ridiculous.
    It's like Juneau…I shit you not.
    Yeah, yeah, yeah…go ahead, make fun. Whatever!
    At least we have a hope of it getting better!!! LOL

    Anyway, this was posted on facebook today by Shelly's husband, Scott and I just had to share.
    I know you guys in Juneau will get a kick out of this!!

    funny, huh??

    Oh and what the hell is this I hear about Johnny Depp being at the tram?
    Someone clue me in, rumor or fact?
    You never know in Juneau!!!

  • I woke up to POURING rain…just pouring buckets and thunder and lighting.
    Which first made me wonder if this was some kind of premonition of a dramatic kind of day….and then just pissed me off…and then made me decide, that's it. Pajama day for all of us because there is no way the kids can go outside in this torrential downpour. So fine…I"m resolved to a pajama day and we're gonna make the best of the shit weather.

    Well then the rain went and stopped.

    Which you would think is good….right?
    Well it's not.
    I wanted to stay in my pj's. I wanted to not have to get the kids dressed….
    AND the fact that I'm not convinced that it's really going to STOP raining for more than a couple hours, so I'm not super excited about the fact that it stopped raining.

    So okay, okay….FINE….off I go to get us all dressed now.

    damn rain…screws me over every time!!!

    LOL