So I'm listening to music…actually this all started because Ceci sent me a song awhile ago that she wanted me to listen to and I am JUST NOW getting around to it…(bad, bad best friend…ugh! ) And it is so her and the lyrics are so her….and it just got me into a sentimental mood…..
I miss writing….so miss my lyrics…..and I miss sitting with my music and really feeling it….really letting it envelop me and letting it take me into moods and emotions that would just spill onto the page or leave me lost in love….in love with writing, in love with words, in love with music that moves me….
And tonight a few songs came on in a row that just reminded me of so much…….songs that have people or memories attached to them and it got me thinking…….I bet a lot of the people don't have a clue that certain songs make me think of them…..and I feel like writing about them tonight…..maybe they'll someday see it….maybe they won't….maybe they will come across it at a time when they felt lonely and unimportant and they needed to know, needed proof, that they are thought of…..or maybe they will never lay eyes on it and nor would they care even if they did…..I have a feeling they would though…who doesn't love knowing a song reminds someone of them….???
I guess that's why they call it the blues Elton John
James and I have quite a few songs…..this is one of them……
"just stare into space, picture my face in your hands…." This song, especially this line, reminds me of sitting in his truck with him, down at the car wash on John Fitch….from midnight until the sun came up……after not talking to him or seeing him for like 5 years…we couldn't talk enough. There was so much to catch up on, so much to say…..
James and I were buds, back in the day. I adored him…..(still do….). When we hung out all the time, he would sing to me. He always sang to me……and I loved it. On this night, as we sat talking in his truck, this song came on and he started singing to me…..and when it came to this line, he put his hand on my face and looked straight into my eyes and sang to me……arrggghhhh! I get chills even now, just thinking of it…..
Into The Night…Benny Mardones.
Reminds me of "the college kid". Come on guys…..this is a quiz….remember his name??
When I was 16, I met a guy that was going to college. He was 21 and I went on my very first real "date" with him. He was also my very first true heart break. He was first for a few other things…..I lied to my mom and told her he was 18. When she found out he was 21, all hell broke loose. It was a mess…..a crazy, crazy time. This song takes me back there and reminds me of him…..
The World I Know Collective Soul
JR….always. His band used to sing this and when I hear this song, I hear his voice…..and I see him on stage and it makes me miss him. Whenever I hear this song on the radio, it feels like a hug from JR….
Praise You Fatboy Slim
This song reminds me of why I LOVE celebrating birthdays. There is a line in this song and that's it….THAT'S why I am so into birthdays for the people I love…….
.
This song makes me think of ALL the people I love. Different times, it's different people….but I always think of people I love and the reason why I love celebrating them….
Everything I own Bread
Zak's Dad…..and I can never, ever get through the whole song without losing it. God, it makes me miss him so, so much. I hate that he's gone. I hate that Zak and Ceci lost him. I hate that my kids never got to know him and I hate that I lost my last chance at a father. 14 years…..14 years and it doesn't hurt any less. Not one bit.
Down in the Boondocks Billy Joe Royal
My cousin Billiejo…..every single time. 🙂 It's her favorite oldie and I remember being kids, listening to this and loving it.
Who Knew Pink
Dave and Wanda……it's a long story…..but this song so makes me think of them. For some crazy reason, in my utterly insecure mind, I thought they didn't want to talk to me. I had tried and tried to get a hold of them and couldn't and I got stupid for a minute…….even though I was an idiot and totally wrong, this song will forever be ingrained to that time when I thought that our friendship had run it's course. Thank God I was wrong!!!!! lol
Cecilia–Simon and Garfunkel
Ceci, of course!!!!! How can I not????
Titanic...Celine Dion…
And THIS is the last song I listened to…..well, tried to listen to because even after all this time, I cannot hear this song. Not for a second. The remix, I am fine with….but the slow version? The original version? Forget it. Can't do it. Zak and I and our little "break" in '97……well, this song just brings it all back and I can't do it….in fact, I even wrote a lyric (ish..LOL!!) about it and you know what?? This is a good of time as any to post it…..what the hell. I wrote this ages ago and I want to end my little music indulgence on a happy note…..and posting my lyrics make me happy. So here it goes. This is one of the very few lyrics I have wrote in the last million years…..and it's one of the ones that just spilled out….no pauses, no starts and stops. This is it.
Sometimes I hate the glow of the Christmas tree lights
and my march to the glacier in the middle of the night
December 22nd and the pouring rain
and the way you tried to never tell me her name
I have forgiven and sometimes I even forget
but all is lost once that song's in my head
I avoid it like death cause I know that it brings
the feelings I've survived and all the suffering
but grocery stores and shopping malls don't care how I feel
and from that first note the feelings are real
a fury of memories crashes inside when that song creeps up and takes me by surprise
It comes on so sudden I gasp for air
try to control my breathing cause you are right there
You'd never understand and I can't explain
why some of your sin deep down still remains
You've paid your dues with more than I've asked
proven that one mistake was exactly just that
But there's some things I guess
time or sorry can't fix
No matter what, no matter how
that song makes me feel like t
his
Whatever the case maybe be, I dig it and was something I really needed to write. 🙂
Anything But Gray 
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